5:19

Sometimes I’m desperately sad for the damaged bits of me. I want to go to them and give then a hug or some kind of assurance. I want them to know I understand and that it’s ok. I want to tell them things will get better; I’d say something like, “one day you won’t feel like this” but part of me knows that’s not true. the parts that know are those damaged parts and they get tired of the lies. I get tired of it too and maybe I just need that hug or that assurance. or some one to say, “I’m sory for your sad parts but it won’t always feel like this.” and then I suppose I’d wait until it didn’t.

I washed my sheets today so they don’t smell like you anymore. Fresh start

I’m trying to understand why I am magnet for liars- people who knowingly and willing lie to me. I guess in some sick way I feel fortunate for having so much practice with dealing with them that I have a sixth sense for it now; I can smell a lie from a mile away.Whatever it is about me, I’m going to fix it. I’m also going to fix the kind of people I’m attracting in my life. But hey universe, I know everything and every person is a lesson, but Think I’ve learned enough about liars, manipulators and the emotionally unavailable to last me a lifetime. Thanks for the reminder though.

I hate when people say “never say never” because I’m saying never right now. Never again. Never ever ever ever again.

Never:

Letting myself be vulnerable
Trusting anyone
Sharing my feelings
Believing in people
Getting my hopes up
Going against my instincts
Allowing myself to feel something

Never again. Never.

Tumblr decided to stop working on my computer, so until I can figure out how to fix it…. so long!